Help Save Marriage
What is the most asked marital question in the world? It is likened to a distressed ship on the sea, unable to get back to shore, passengers in fear of death on every side. Help Save Marriage bellows the call, but many wonder HOW?
The key is communication. If you want to help save marriage (yours or someone elses), you will have to get him or her to communicate with you. People are quick to point the finger of blame at other people, as to why the statistics on divorce are so high. Here is the TRUTH. It comes down to communication.
How to Communicate?
Some people simply have not learned HOW to communicate with others. Let alone in the throes of the most volatile relationship – marriage. For newlyweds, one of the most crucial skills to get good at is communication. Of course due to the physical nature of this relationship, communication may take a backseat to SEX, but learning your spouse and how they communicate, the style of their communication, what they withhold from you and what they are willing to share is important.
Take The Communication Quiz
Here are some basics that both newly married and seasoned veterans need to master. It only happens over time to. Talk. Just really sit down and talk to your partner. Avoid assuming anything. Do not finish their sentences for them. Ask, them questions that require them to explain what they mean. In other words, avoid short, yes or no questions.
1. Just say, “Jenny, what do you think about …?” Then close your mouth and open your ears. This applies to either party by the way. So, “John, what were you thinking about vacationing this spring?”
These are very simple questions, but notice they cannot be answered with a short, curt Yes or No. They require you to explain or else feel very awkward.
So, when do you use these types of questions? This is a very common question, and it does require your judgment to a certain extent.
2. If you and your spouse just had an argument, that is probably not the best time to ask these questions. If you have been following the theme so far, we are talking about basic things you can do to help save marriage, right? So, it should be clear that you may need to let things cool down and cool off for a while. You must use your judgment to determine how long “a while” is.
So talk to your mate. And your job then becomes that of an active listener. Don’t just hear them. Strive to see things from their perspective and what they really want to communicate to you.
When you acknowledge what they have said, you can always repeat back to them what you heard them say, in your own words. It may be a bit frustrating for you to say back exactly what was just said to you, but this is the basis for getting understanding. This will make your partner feel special and wanted.
You will have misunderstandings, disagreements and arguments. But putting into use what you have learned on this topic should not only help to help save marriage but help you live harmoniously ever after.
